Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Recently, I listened to a person talk about why gay people should not be able to get “married”. (Enter civil unions is more precisely what it is we do, but I’ve learned not to try to clarify a bigot’s vocabulary)

As is my habit when confronted with opinions that differ from mine, I sincerely and politely asked this person’s reasoning behind the opinion. (Really, sometimes you learn something and sometimes you teach something by being interested in the how and why people come to their opinions.)

Someday, I hope to ask this question and hear something interesting. But not this time, I got the same old, “It’s bad for families.”

How, specifically, is it bad for families?

This is what I was told: “I believe homosexuality is a sin and I’ve taught my children that also. If the state allows homosexuals to marry, then it is undermining what I am trying to teach my children.”

Wait. I’m still biting my tongue bloody over it.

Okay. My brain isn’t about to explode anymore.

See, when I was raising my child, I never felt that the state had to back up my moral teachings in order for them to be valid. In fact, there are several laws that I believe are immoral and yet you didn’t find me at the statehouse door, demanding that they be changed in order to back up my parental authority.

When I taught my son what “I” believed on a particular subject and why, I also told him what they believed and why, and what those people believed and why. I told him what I knew of the history of an issue.

Why? Because I wanted him to think for himself, to look at every side of any issue and compare it to his internal moral compass and then come to his own decision to what his beliefs on the issue might be.

Because I am not afraid. I’m not afraid that my child might think or believe differently than me. I’m not afraid that he will choose his own religious following, or choose no religious following. I’m not afraid of him being different from me.

I would be very afraid, however, if he justified hatred in a religion's name.



Thor sez: Love your neighbor means everyone, not just the people like you.

5 comments:

Uncle Zoloft said...

One million thank yous. If you get a chance poll people you know about how they are going to vote on Amendment #1 this November. We, the glbt community and our allies, have dubbed it "The Family Discrimination Amendment."

Have you closed minded friends visit: dumbamendment.com
Perhaps a little animation would help them to understand the real harm and issues that are involved this upcoming vote.

JanetLee said...

Uncle Z - the people that I know who speak like this don't want to be educated or informed. They clutch their hands over their ears and hum hymns to themselves. They do not care about facts, they do not care about people. They only care that they are "right" and any one else is "wrong". I just keep remembering how, less than forty years ago, people were saying that inter-racial marriage was wrong, against God and family, and the laws against it must stand. Today, most would agree that it was wrong to believe that. But back then, people believed it as fervently as they believe that allowing gays to "marry" is wrong.
I only hope that the Amendment will fail. But I have little hope that it will. Too many people in this state love to hate in the name of Jesus. Which is fine, hate all you want. Just don't make me, by law, follow the teachings of your religion.

Uncle Zoloft said...

The really sad fact is that the Culture War was over when glbt citizens wanted the benefits of civil unions and that even though the war was won these "religious" folk are still so angry and hateful. It is so sad that only an tragedy like Matthew Shepard's beating would, perhaps, change voters minds.
I can not tell you how awful it feels to have who I love be put up for a vote. To become 2nd class by law.
Maybe the questions to ask these holy rollers are: What should glbt citizens of this state do? and Who's next on their hate list?

Sunnie (Kaytee) said...

I will be the first one to admit, I don't understand have of what amendments say in legal terms. I much prefer layman's terms. I will say, I have never been opposed to gay marriages, bi-racial relationships, or anything. I grew up with racial "grandparents." They tried to mold me that way, but I knew it was wrong and resisted. I, personally, see nothing wrong with same sex marriages. As long as two people love each other and want to commit to each other, what's the big deal? It's not like they're flaunting theirselves. They want to lead a normal life like the rest of us. I've never been uncomfortable with differences. I like to think I keep an open mind when it comes to sexual preferences, races, and personal choices. If I disagree with someone, explain to me your side. That's all I ask and all I can do.

Uncle Zoloft said...

Sunnie,
Thank you for your support.

Another vote NO on Amendment #1!

We've been counting how many votes we have, between friends, family, co-workers, business associates, our lawyer and even our contractor and his crew. We have, as a couple, over 200 NO votes. I keep crossing my fingers that everyone who is against the Family Discrimination Amendment will vote count as well; we only need 600,000 to win! ~ it's all in the numbers.