As The Decade Turns

When I was 20, I said, "I can't live my life like this." And I made some changes - pretty stupid ones that did not lead to a better life - but I was 20 and heart breakingly naive.

When I was 30, I said, "I can't live my life like this." And I went to college and got a new career.

When I was 40, I said, "I can't live my life like this." And I left my bad marriage, struck out on my own and wrote my first novel.

Today, as I'm looking at turning 50 in the coming year, I have a strong sense that I don't deserve to say "I can't live my life like this" because I have so much.

I have a wonderful man who loves me, I have family, I have friends, I have a good job that provides me with a comfortable living, I am healthy. I am really fortunate with where I am. When I think of the situations others are in, I am ashamed of my selfishness.

So why am I so unhappy? Is it just some habit I've gotten into? Thinking I need to reinvent myself every 10 years? Is it because as I get older, I'm more aware that there isn't much time to recover from any disastrous life changes? Am I afraid? Is it peri-menopause hormonal fluctuations?

I hate telling people I feel depressed because the first question they ask is, "Why?" And I don't have a why, I just do and it makes me feel ashamed and ungrateful.

So I think the brave new life changing event for my 50th year is for me to stop pretending that I'm okay. I've spent the last year acting like myself. Before a social engagement, I have to psych myself up. Before work, I have to put on my nurse personality, force a smile on my face and go pretend for 12 hours at a time.

I've got to find some way to stop pretending to be me and get back to actually being me.

Loki sez: You aren't going to adopt more cats, are you?

Cats Are Fast!

Catnipped Thor wants more!

Playing with my Christmas Present

What is this, you say? No kitten video? Well, there was one, but Blogger said something was wrong with it. So I will attempt it again later.

Loki Sunday

Stalking the wild Zhu Zhu hamster.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to all and may you have the best gift - family and friends whether near or far.

Thank you for putting up with our silliness and for your comments through the year. It makes me happy than my silly little kittens can brighten someone's day.

The boys surprised me a little with their reactions to the Zhu Zhu hamster Santa brought them.

Loki was very interested right away:

Thor was more cautious and stayed on top of the cat tree until I held it up for him to examine:



Loki sez: I love you, Santa!

Thor sez: Why does Santa taste like catnip?

Revenge of the Thor

Before, with cute puff balls:

After, with no cute puff balls:


Thor sez: Prove it!

I'm Such a Bad Blogger

I totally forgot Loki Sunday. Granted, I was running the streets, finishing up my shopping before the marathon I will endure the next three nights, but still.

Poor Loki. He deserves a video for this slight.


I didn't say it was an interesting video!

Ugh, Simply, Ugh

For some ambien brain fogged reason, I thought it would be swell to let the kittens sleep with me today.

The boyz say: What do you expect? This bed is too small.

I suppose it'll be okay. I slept four hours before Thor woke me up.

Thor sez: Um. It's lunch time.

But I went right back to sleep. Only to have the doorbell wake me up one hour later.

Loki sez: It could have been the FedEx man!!!

Finally gave up on sleep to discover that my backyard is now the left bank of Church Creek and the front yard is the right bank. Perhaps all those dreams I've had over the years of having to get to work by canoe were premonitions for today.

That is the creek out of it's banks in my and the neighbor's back yards. If I felt like a) getting dressed, b)getting rained on, c) stepping in water above my ankles and d) getting yelled at for taking Jason's camera out in the pouring rain, I could probably get pictures of some hermit crabs waiting out the high tide by climbing up into the bushes.

Thor's Day!

Boy oh boy and girls. If babies were snowflakes, we'd be having a white Christmas!

Thor sez: Will there be sledding? Skiing?

Happy Pinning Day!

Congrats to my niece Sarah, and our night shift tech extraordinaire Kelly who are graduating from nursing school and will receive their nursing pins tonight!

I managed to get the Christmas tree decorated today. Hard to get in the mood when it's 70 degrees outside. Now, I don't need sub-zero temps or snow, mind you. A nice brisk 50 would be okay.

The cat torture continues.


Thor sez: Mom! The raccoon gang will see!!
(He wasn't really that mad, I was just moving his hind end at the time and it was just an ordinary meow, I promise no real torture was involved. Just bruised kitten ego.)

Loki Sunday (Holiday Edition)

Loki sez:

TAKE

IT

OFF!!

Stuff

I need to get a Christmas tree for sure. Yikes.

Wrestle-mania has arrived:



4:30 am laugh until you cry moment:

Y'all have no idea how funny things are between 3:30 and 4:30 in the morning.

The knee loves the new shoes, the cyst in my foot not so much. Knee pain or searing nerve pain? Decisions, decisions. The knee pain is old and boring, the searing nerve pain was limited to the ball of my foot and my middle toe and while no pain is desirable, at least it was novel.

The Fed Ex driver just came and I got the package, then saw myself in the mirror with serious bed head, a pillow crease across my cheek, my mascara still under my eyes (due to above video and drop dead fred into bed tired this morning), in my bathrobe with a cup of coffee in my hand. Don't think he'll think I'm a stripper like the young guys at the apartment I used to live in years (and years and years) ago, do you?

The Griswald Christmas tree light competition down the street has begun. The my-side-of-the-street Griswalds have seriously upped the ante this year with several new displays, including what looks like a four foot wide "JOY" sign hanging from a tree. Seriously, you can see their lights from outer space.

Loki sez: OMCC! He's REAL!!!!

Thor's Day!

Thor's strangeness is beginning to worry me. First he was drinking from the fish bowl. Then I discovered his daily knocking down the bathtub plug is nothing but a ruse to drink any shower water that may have collected in the plug. I offered to go dip some water out of a mud puddle or the creek for him, but I just got a Thor look.

Yeah, this one:



Thor sez: Human, feed me or begone.

More Magnolia

Over the years, visitors have carved their names on the bamboo:

A quiet back corner in the formal camellia garden:

Along the nature "bike" bath, ahem..some herons and the black bird is an anhinga:

Anhingas are water birds but don't have the oils that keep their feathers dry so you'll see them with wings outstretched to dry:

The moorhens were very upset with my walking by and they can make some scary noises, let me tell you, has nothing to do with the time I was attacked by a moorhen when I walked too close to her nest.


Thor sez: Excuse me, this is Kittens on the Keyboard, not Nature Walks on the Keyboard.
Okay, stand back, I'm going to try something "techy".
This is my son playing guitar on his ship.
Tested and safe, it won't take you to some weird place.

Camellia Hunting

Jason had a photo shoot this afternoon, so I took advantage of the sunny weather and went to Magnolia Plantation to see how the camellias are coming along. They won't be in full bloom until late December into January, but there were some getting started with the winter show.








Along with the camellias were some very confused azaleas:

Loki Sunday

Since we had an annoyed Thor, I think it is only fair that we have an annoyed Loki. Which is hard to find because Loki only has three moods: Sleeping, eating and running in terror from the FedEx driver.



Loki sez: I run from the UPS driver too.

My New Most Favorite Place on Earth

Pop Suede LOLcat movie reviews.

Brilliant!

P.S. if you need extras I gots plenty.

Oooh Secret Stuff!

My mother has given in to pressure from the grandkids to actually write down her recipes. I, much like my mother, don't have real recipes, we just put some of this, some of that, how much, I dunno, about two shakes, a couple of these, one of those.

So, she has written down some of her classics - the most coveted are the mac and cheese and the German chocolate cakes recipes - and I'm typing them up and am going to print them off on some fancy paper she picked out.

I feel like I need some security here to make sure these don't fall into the wrong hands. There'd be mac and cheese everywhere! Mad cheese shortages, riots...

Thor sez: Here, I'll protect them with all my pointy parts! Well, human, you can see them or have them safe, make up your mind.
(Thor sure likes to hang his chin over edges.)

Funniest Movie Review, Evah!

LOLCat Full Moon.

Thor's Day!

Nothing can annoy a cat like a human with a camera. And since Thor has the best annoyed faces on the planet, he gets annoyed a lot.







Thor sez: I have claws you know.